Pics of play on Saturday Night - Pic will now be added to blog going forward

2.29.16 Missing

It's hard being a Monday without Him.

Was a good day, but still hard.  i miss Him.

Been doing some more thinking but have to settle my thoughts before i get them out.  Tomorrow.....

Tomorrow is our normal.................

2.28.16 Saturday night

Ok, here goes. i'm so tired, but i know that i need to get this down. i'll do the best i can.

Oliver was here earlier than expected yesterday, which was good. i was dressed and ready to go out and have something to eat. Had sushi. Not that it matters, lol.

We came back here and watched a movie, which by the way Black Mass was really just eh. Granted i love me some Johnny Depp, but i couldn't get into this movie.

Master had requested that pictures be taken, and last time i made the mistake of forgetting. i made sure that it didn't happen this time. i'm wondering if they will end up being posted?  i do hope He is pleased.

So i was cuffed and hung by the rafters, my legs tied together. Pictures then taken. Then......

i was whipped with Oliver's belt and spanked by his hand. All while hanging. i was then removed from the rafters and placed on the bed. my legs bent, separated and tied. my fox tail in. i was then taken.

Apparently g spots do exist. Never in my life and experience has mine been found. Until now. i honestly didn't think i even had one. i'd like to experience the feeling again. i need to get Masters approval.

i'm looking forward to the other things that Master has been thinking about. i'm really enjoying the experiences that have been going on and i appreciate everything that Master is allowing.

Even though the weekend was good, i do look forward to getting back to our normal. it will be an extra day without Him this weekend.....................i need Him.

2.27.16 Just a good night before the night begins

It's a playing night.

i will be restrained.

i will write about it tomorrow.

i am looking forward to it.

i am hoping i go into sub space.

2.26.16 Good day to go into the weekend with

Master and i were finally able to get some "alone" time.

i seriously needed it. i think we both did. i needed that physical connection again. Big time. i feel SO much better. Seriously, no one has ever made me feel the way that Master does. No one makes me cum they way that He does. No one.

i should have been able to hold out longer, but i just couldn't do it. i felt myself getting dark but then accidentally let go. i apologized profusely to Master. i've only ever done that one other time. i love going dark.

i'm going to get to play this weekend with Oliver. i think we are going to try the restraints i've gotten. i'm looking forward to it. Master is ordering pictures be taken. i'm very much looking forward to that as well. i will ask to be blindfolded again. Help me feel Master in front of me. i like that. No. Love that. i must also wear my plug, or perhaps tail. What will come after..............

i doubt i will hear from Him this weekend. He will be very busy. As usual i will miss Him incredibly much.

i look forward to my future with Master. i have been told to look into some things that we will be trying. i'm excited. He's also added an extra job. Something to help Him with. i feel very good about it.

i've also reached out to a few female friends. See what happens there............................ :)

2.25.16 Emotional i guess

Day sucked. Only got 1/2 day with Him. If that. Honestly i don't know how i will handle things if i get a new job that will not allow me to contact Him constantly. i just want to move. i'm down.

When i'm down and do not get my time with Him i seriously take it out on everyone around me. i take my misery out on others. Yes i know it's not right, but most of the time i can't help it. i'm sad tonight. i miss Him.

i want our time back, and i know with the weekend coming it may be worse. Plus Master will be unavailable on Monday. Will i use others to fill my space? Maybe???? Yes, i know that's not right either.

i look forward to tomorrow. i am hoping that He will have time for me. It's been a long while since we've had some "alone" time. i need it. i need Him.

i don't know. Wish i could just fly there..........................................

2.24.16 Lots of reading today and the day, well...

i get daily emails from The Submissive Guide and another self help site. i've been saving all of the emails that look like they would be of interest to me until i found the time to read them. Today was that day.

Found some okay stuff.

Something that i thought that i could add to a part of a ritual would be something of a "bedtime inspection". As in making sure my body is in what condition that Master would want it to be in and proving it to Him. Just something of a statement that i ran by while reading. i'd have to discuss it with Him. i do have night rituals now, so maybe adding more to the nighttime would be too much. Not sure.

i did not read about this today, but spoke with someone about using rubber bands on my tits because he has used this on a sub prior. i am interested in seeing how that feels and works. i'd like to give it a try, but again, with Masters direction and order.

So the emails that i found of interest that i wanted to read about were the following:

• Surviving Loneliness
• Rituals to Enhance Your Relationship
• Stop Emotional Snowballing
• Laws of Attraction - Manifestation
• Finding Inner Peace Among Turmoil
• What To Do When Life Sucks

Most of it i already knew about. Pretty self explanatory too. Don't feed into others, trust yourself, love yourself stuff. It's hard for me to love myself. i don't know how to do it or why i even would. Life long issue there. Still trying to find out how to change that. Someday. 

my day, well, was mostly spent missing Master. He's had a really really busy week. i'm hoping that finally on Friday morning we get get some alone time. It's been a really long time. i miss it, and really miss Him. 

i have a lot on my mind. Mostly about potential play dates. Pros and cons of it all. To be honest, i shouldn't really be concerned with it but it's stressing me out. In the end it is not my decision at all. It's strictly Masters decision, His needs and His wants. 

Kinda tired of thinking.............................